


amour de ma vie

by ethereal_flower



Category: Shingeki no Kyojin | Attack on Titan
Genre: Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Multi, Platonic Soulmates, Romantic Soulmates, Sad, Slow Dancing, Soulmates, dead characters visit the living
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2021-02-17
Updated: 2021-02-28
Packaged: 2021-03-12 16:40:12
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Major Character Death
Chapters: 2
Words: 2,990
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/29512626
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/ethereal_flower/pseuds/ethereal_flower
Summary: a four part story about four pairs of soulmates who deserved better.whether you see them romantically or platonic, it's up to you.spoilers ahead, you've been warned
Relationships: Hitch Dreyse/Marlo Sand | Marlowe Freudenberg, Levi Ackerman/Erwin Smith, Moblit Berner/Hange Zoë, Reiner Braun/Bertolt Hoover
Comments: 4
Kudos: 27





	1. veni, vedi, amavi

**Author's Note:**

> Summary: Levi knew he was alone, but in some nights, a certain blonde would visit him. And one of these nights became longer.

A cup of warm tea, a silent dead night and the warmth of his own old coat. A lovely time to rewind, to reminisce...to grieve. 

Beautiful. 

Dark. 

There was no escape. No point in returning. Levi had to accept that fact. Only his promise needs to be done. 

He knew it the moment Erwin raised his hand, stuck in a delusional memory of his childhood. A pitiful man, of such one with great honor and responsibility. A man who wanted nothing more but to see the truth that he had been seeking, and that dream was taken away from him. 

"Give up on your dream and die." 

If Levi hadn't said those words to Erwin, would he have lived? Would he have been able to see the ocean like they did? And discover the truth about the Titans and the world?

But no. Even if he hadn't said such, nothing would have changed. Erwin is a selfless- yet selfish man. A devil, as one would say. 

Both him and Hange didn't know him well, at least now Levi did. 

He was humanity's strongest soldier. And yet he couldn't prevent anything else from happening. He guessed that this must mean hitting his weakest point. 

A sigh escaped from his lips, as he looked at the pocket watch given to him by the Anti-Marleyan Volunteers. "It's already 10 o'clock in the evening." Levi mumbled to himself, shivering a bit around the even large coat. 

It was just him tonight. All of the cadets had now fallen asleep in their respective cabins, so was Hange in their room. He knew they were grieving as well. At the very least he heard Hange scream and cry out of despair for losing Moblit- and it wasn't a pleasant sight to see. 

After all, they were all grieving. 

More minutes passed, Levi decided to retire to his room. Blowing the candle before leaving the room, the captain felt a little colder than usual. "Must be the damn wind..." He muttered under his breath. 

It seemed like nature had other plans. The air became more colder, and internally Levi was starting to freak out. The temperature dropped from where he was standing. 

It was summer for fuck's sake. 

"Sorry, it's something I can't control." Levi heard a voice say near him. It couldn't be. The voice was nostalgic, it was the same voice he would hear during every time of the day. A voice that in his ears oddly sounded pleasant. 

Erwin Smith. No one else could make him be this way than him. 

Levi tried to remain calm, turning his head to meet the other. "What are you doing here? Have you come to haunt me?" He asked, a bit of sarcasm and bitterness at the tip of his tongue. Erwin- or at least he thinks it is, only laughed at him lowly. "Well what do you think? Can't I visit my old friends from time to time?" 

Time to time? Does that mean he has been visiting them many times now? Levi thought, his lips pressed like a thin line. "Tch. And you can get to control the wind? I didn't know ghosts could do that." He said as he crossed his arms. Erwin smiled, stepping forward for Levi to see. Levi wasn't one who believed in such, so it did shock Erwin. 

"It's in our spirit, Levi. I told you, it's something I can't control." The blonde said as if it was everyday talk. Levi didn't answer, so Erwin cleared his throat to get his attention. 

The raven haired man looked up at his former superior, his face a bit softer than the first he saw him. "Why did you come here?" Levi asked. There was nothing in his voice than pure curiosity. 

Erwin exhaled, a small smile bearing on his lips. "I wanted to see you." He said directly, that Levi momentarily raised his eyebrows. "See me? Why didn't you do so earlier?" He asked, picking up a bit of annoyance. 

He shook his head a bit and chuckled. "I couldn't bother you. I know you and Hange have a lot to do." Erwin said, his smile not leaving from his face. 

But Levi only stayed silent, looking at him intently. "....it's been two years. Do you think I forgot?" Were the words that came from his mouth when he spoke again.

Two years from today, they got Wall Maria back and managed to kill Bertholdt Hoover, the Colossal Titan after Armin had eaten him as a Pure Titan. There was an argument between who should get the serum between Erwin and Armin. 

The younger boy was chosen, not out of pity for Eren and Mikasa, but because Erwin deserved to rest even if it meant not seeing his dream come true.

And Levi never regretted his choice.

"Levi?" Erwin called out to him, as the shorter man was starting to space out. "I'm fine Erwin." 

"You're not. I know when you're overthinking." 

"I said I'm okay, I just need to sleep." 

"What? But you never sleep." 

Then it hits him. Right. Levi forgot about his insomnia. Embarassing. He sighed, looking away from Erwin. "Oh Levi. You don't need to hide anything from me." The taller man said, stepping closer until he was just an inch away from Levi. 

He places a hand on Levi's shoulder. "What is it that is bothering you?" He asked. Levi mumbled something against his breath, the only words he could hear were "the future might get shitty" or something like that. 

But it was enough for Erwin to understand. As if his ghost was able to touch his shoulder, Levi's eyes widened a bit when Erwin managed to press his body against his own, into a gentle hug.

Levi stood stuck where he was standing, while Erwin didn't let it bother him and kept his arms around Levi. 

Everything became a blur around him, the only focus on his mind was on Erwin, and him alone. "Why are you doing this?" Levi asked, a bit confused. 

He couldn't comprehend if it was confusion anyways. It felt like he could understand what it was, but yet he couldn't get the concept. 

Before he could expect an answer from Erwin, the other's gaze turned to a mysterious machine. It was a box with a flat circular disc with a horn on top. "What is that device?" Erwin asked, genuinely curious. 

Levi pulled away from the hug, his eyes now gazing onto the device as well. "That's a gramophone, a strange device into which music can be played by putting that disc as you can see, depending on what type of music you want. After taking Wall Maria back and eradicating the Titans within, Paradis has been open to the world and has now contact from the outside world."He explained. 

Erwin was amazed, his smile as if he was a little kid who first discovered a rock. "I see...that's amazing." Levi almost wanted to laugh at his childlike innocence. He wished that he could have seen that side of Erwin more. 

"Hey Levi. Can you...use it?" Erwin asked, gesturing towards the gramophone. Levi had some second thoughts because he knew that if the wrong song played, it could wake the whole Survey Corps up. 

Fortunately, when he used the said device, the music that came was a sweet sound from something that was called a piano; a musical instrument he heard previously from Hange and Yelena's private discussion. There were now a few stores selling them too, but they were all expensive. 

The melody was pleasant to Erwin's ears, that Levi almost was tempted to smile. Their gaze soon met again, but this time, the silence was just nothing but a blur as well. Erwin outstretched his hand for Levi to take. 

"Levi...is it okay if we...dance?" 

It was strange, as Erwin could have surely saved this up for some random woman. But instead, he said it to him. Levi could just reject it, and to add on, he wasn't a dancer himself. 

Back at Historia's coronation, he was pulled into dancing thanks to Hange, but he ended up stepping into their and his own toes a lot. 

But this was different. This was Erwin standing in front of him. And he knew very well that this could be the first and last time he would ever dance with him. It didn't matter if Levi would make a mistake. 

Trying to remember what he learned, at least, Levi tried to place Erwin's left arm around his back, only to find that it still didn't grow back even in death. "What the fuck Erwin? Didn't any deity allow you to grow your arm back?" He said, his annoyance showing through while Erwin had a slight flush of pink on his cheeks. "Are you that worried?" 

"Shut up." 

Levi having no choice, placed his left arm around Erwin's lower back, while the other held on Erwin's right hand. As if reading his mind, the blonde took a step forward, while Levi took the next step. 

They kept on repeating this, slowly and trying to get into the moment as they danced. Both of Levi's hands were now on Erwin's sides, as the taller managed to hold Levi's whole body with one arm, swaying slightly to the beat of the music as they danced the night away. 

And Levi would be lying if he said he didn't want this to last. 

"Erwin..." He says his name as if he was calling out for him almost not to leave him. Erwin smiled softly, his chin resting against Levi's head as they kept on swaying. "Mm...Levi...I'm here. Not going anywhere." He says. 

Levi knew he was lying, he knows Erwin just said that to make him believe a false hope that he was alive. He can always sense when Erwin would say anything just so it could make things easier for him. 

The both of them stayed silent when the music had stopped. Levi pried away from Erwin's hold to play the music again. The taller man didn't stop him anyways. He knew why Levi had done such. "Don't leave." Levi said, his voice almost demanding. 

Erwin nodded, grunting as a reply. His hand trailed Levi's back and neck, holding him as if he was some kind of fragile glass as they danced slow in the dark of night. 

Before, Levi wanted these haunting nights to end. 

But tonight, he didn't want it end.

He would believe thousands or millions of Erwin's lies and false promises, dancing slow in the dark with the same music over and over again if it means getting him to stay in his arms for a long time.


	2. amor vincit omnia

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Summary: Late night experiments is Hange's coping mechanism. And one night, they had to wait a little longer for the results.

The dark sky was filled with stars. 

A normal person would enjoy the night sky, stargazing or maybe just lie down and sleep. 

Not Hange. They were busy with their usual experiments. These experiments would be the ones who would give them comfort. As crazy as it sounds, these experiments indeed gave them comfort, just as they were the crazy scientist themselves. 

Pathetic. 

They felt pathetic. As if experiments would bring anyone back. As if it would bring him back. 

Moblit Berner- to say was an idiot. A huge idiot. A reckless idiot. A selfless idiot. Why? Because he never cared for anyone else than he ever did with Hange. But Hange- they were more idiotic than Moblit. 

Which is probably why Moblit became an idiot in the first place. Alright, let's face it. They were both idiots. Idiots who cared for one another, through thick and thin. Was this what companionship felt? Was this what it feels to have someone to hold onto? To listen to? 

And now, Hange knows it. He's gone. Moblit was gone. The last time they had both of their eyes still seeing clearly, the last thing they saw was Moblit. Then surely...

"...the last thing he saw was me." Hange muttered under their breath, as they took a break from their experiment. 

Seeing the gramophone from behind them, Hange began to wonder what could Moblit have said seeing the strange device which played music. He surely would have said "Calm down Hange!" or something in between those lines- a fit of worry and anxiousness. 

Or maybe, they could have tried. 

Tried what? 

What could they have tried? 

Hange placed a hand over their hair, laughing to theirselves about the thought of it. They could see him- being confused and standing still as everyone around them tried to dance. "Idiot." They said under a strained breath. 

They could imagine him having a rank higher as well, now that Hange was the Commander after Erwin's death. They knew how much it affected Levi, as much as it also affected them. Erwin was like a brother to them, someone they and the whole Survey Corps could look up and trust. 

But Erwin Smith was no innocent of a man. If lives had to be sacrificed for humanity's sake, he would do so. 

He had always done that- and because of that, it constantly put Hange and Moblit at risk. Although for them, that risk turned into reality. Moblit was dead- all to protect them. 

Did they blame Erwin for Moblit's death? No. They could never do that, even if they wanted to. Because Erwin suffered just as everyone else. 

Hange shook their head, trying to clear their head from the past. "What am I thinking? I should be focusing on this..." They muttered under their breath. 

"You haven't changed a bit, Section Commander." 

Upon hearing the voice, Hange made a loud noise, almost falling unto their feet. "W-What is this?! Who are you?! Where the fuck are you?!" They were like talking to the wind. Or maybe they were crazy now. 

Like really crazy. They didn't really know anymore. 

But the sound of footsteps didn't help that much. As Hange adjusted their glasses, they could soon make out the figure in front of them. 

Brown hair, an oval shaped face and a man of average yet lean built. There was no one else who looked like this. At least to Hange's eyes because the person in front of them was none other than Moblit Berner. 

The said man was looking at his superior with worry, a hand stretched out to help them. "....you haven't changed a bit, Section Commander." He says again with a small smile; just like how Hange saw him in their thoughts and dreams. 

"M-Moblit...how...why..." They were lost for words, knees on the floor as they gripped unto Moblit- who was all flesh and bone. Hange dipped their fingernails harshly on Moblit's pants, trying to access the situation. "Who are you?! Why are you pretending to be Moblit?" 

The man was shocked to see Hange's state, who tried to help them up. "Section Commander...its me. It's really me..." He says, this time gently yet serious. 

Hange looked up at the man, still in denial. But after looking at him- oh. Oh, there he was. 

The eyes gave it away, and so did the shape of his face. It was Moblit. Their dear Moblit. No doubt, it was him. Hange felt their knees go weak again, but this time, Moblit caught them by their waist, bringing them to sit on their chair. "I didn't want you to get hurt so..." Moblit stated as he trailed off.

The former section commander didn't let him speak as the wrapped their arms around Moblit's neck, feeling a gush of different emotions. 

Elation. 

Pain. 

Anger. 

Anxiety. 

All of these feelings, it made their body shake uncontrollably, as if they were sobbing. Their teeth were grinding together, eyes glistening although no tears were present. "Y-You...you idiot...didn't have to...push...me..." Hange said the words through their teeth. 

Moblit- or more so, his spirit, hitched his breath, before his face held a worried and pained expression. His hands were now around Hange's back, rubbing small comforting circles on their back. 

"I'm sorry. I couldn't let you die..." He said softly.

"Either way, we both could have." Hange answered coldly, their lips nearly pressing against Moblit's neck. He closed his eyes as he relished the feeling. How much he wanted to be with them again. 

And Moblit felt a pit in his stomach. He knew that Hange would be with him again, but it would cost their life soon enough. 

But he didn't want to think about that. All that Moblit ever wanted to think about was how Hange was here- breathing and living right before his eyes. 

He saw how absolutely breathtaking they looked. 

"Hange...I know it's late...but..." 

He trailed off, not used to address Hange by their first name, but Hange looked at him, their eyes seemingly glowing beautifully as they looked at him. "Yes?" They answered, voice strained with tiredness. 

For a moment, Hange saw a light of serenity glow on his head as they pulled away. He looked breathtaking. 

"...I know what the device behind you does. Because unlike Erwin, I try to see what new discoveries you have seen...and I heard that device makes music...so..." Moblit trailed off again, before Hange held his hand and they stood up. "That's right. A dance. We can dance...if you'd like." 

Moblit didn't say anything else, his eyes fixated on Hange alone. The latter's breath hitched as they felt an arm wrap underneath their middle area, as the gramophone behind began to play a soft tune. 

Hange took Moblit's arm, their eyes fixed on the other's brown orbs, as they swayed lightly, just gazing into each other's eyes. 

"Who taught you?" Hange asked, as Moblit smiled, his steps becoming a bit bigger. "A person named Hange Zoe did." He said. 

It was a false reality. It was false hope. 

But to Hange- this was real.

**Author's Note:**

> I'm literally trying not to cry 😢 I hope they aren't too OOC. Tell me what you guys think about this in the comments below!


End file.
